Fickle Faithfulness

I have finally decided to brave the intimidating waters of the blogging world. Swirling around with what seems to be perfect home makers, hilarious pundits, and creative writers, I am not really sure what I am doing here. My grammar has passed me along from year to year in college, but I would never teach a class on it. My outlook on life is similar to the other gut-ton of middle-income, white, Christian women out there. I'm just not certain I have a lot to offer to you.

As a marketing major, I realize I have just made the worst sales pitch of my life, but I want to always be transparent on this blog. I never want to portray a woman who has it anywhere near that illusive place we call "together." I do not have it together. None of us really do. I am always about 6,000 mega-feet (my measurements are always scientific) from someone else's picture of perfection. Actual perfection? I have never actually seen it.

So here I am tromping into the glorious mud-puddle I call my life, and writing to you. I'll share my thoughts, my dreams, and the ridiculous activities I fall into. I will laugh at myself and at this life, and my great hope is that you will join me.

Then there's the name of this blog...

Unless you're from the 1800s, a small village in England, or you just love researching the meanings to Mumford and Sons songs, you probably rarely use the word fickle. I'm bringing it back! It's a fantastic word, and it reminds me of peanut brittle for some reason.

Fickle - changeable: likely to change, especially in affections, intentions, loyalties, or preferences

Ladies and gentleman (the brave guy who gave my blog a shot), that is the very definition of my soul most of the time. There are wonderful moments where my allegiance stands firm in Christ, but often it seems like the very next moment I am thinking or doing something that stands in complete opposition to Him. I find myself asking "What the heck is wrong with me," every single day. Sometimes I think I will never change and I will never learn to be truly faithful.

Then there are those few moments of glory, when I truly believe Him with my whole heart and mind. Those moments when it seems that I am walking so close to Jesus, that I have a one foot always in His shadow and I haven't even looked off the path, much less walked off. Those moments are rare, but they are always a reminder of why I live. So although I lose focus often, and my faith is fickle, these moments are the source of life-giving hope.

From glory to glory, I continue for my Constant Companion.


Much Love,
Sarah Jean